how we met

What can I say, Vegas

Robert’s Perspective

What can I say, it was Vegas. Reality is there is a certain allure to Las Vegas that allows things to happen that may have otherwise never come to materialize. Leading up to our “work” Vegas trip, Mireille and I began to rekindle our relationship a bit and had been texting and calling back in forth quite a bit. Mireille was also turning 30 and I had a strange feeling there would be a tipping point in our relationship in either direction. Keeping with the theme, there were a few gambles I had taken prior to the trip. By gambles, we decided to have our flights pushed back a few days on the return home and booked a room at the Aria hotel. 1003251_10100302726116698_1325406177_nIn sales, these are called buying signs. As our plan developed, I decided to bring a few birthday gifts that I would sprinkle in over the course of the trip.

From the moment we took off I could tell things between us were different than before. The thing about Mireille is that she’s not overly vocal about her feelings so its key to pay attention to her mannerisms. From the time we left Atlanta to Las Vegas the way she looked at me, put her arms around my neck, even the way she held my hand seemed to be different. There was a certain spark that was back in our relationship that had been absent for the previous couple of months.

The main focus of the trip was technically work, but my focus was to find a way to make the trip all about her 30th birthday. The morning of Mireille’s 30th birthday I presented her with a gift I knew she had been wanting for quite some time. When we dated the first time, I overheard Mireille talking about wanting a monogram necklace. What she didn’t realize was I had one made for her at a local boutique in Atlanta. The necklace included her initials at the time (MAM). The look on her face was priceless. That evening once all of the work functions were done, we decided to go to a local club. There were between 5 or so people from work that were looking to have a good time that evening when one of the girls we were with knew an old friend from back home now working and living in Las Vegas. When we arrived we were escorted to a roped off VIP section and provided a couple bottles of liquor for that evenings shenanigans. Lets just say the drinks were… flowing. What else to do after that than to catch a few hands at the tables…great idea. We started playing a few hands and for one reason or another We. Could. Not. Lose. I mean seriously, an entire table of colleagues and everyone seemed to walk away with cash in the pocket. I handed Mireille a couple huge stack of chips and told her to cash out. To this day, I’ve still never seen a dollar of my winnings from that evening. It didn’t matter. We spent the remainder of the evening together carrying on laughing, dancing and talking about any and everything under the sun.

When the work trip was finished, Mireille and I packed up and headed to Aria hotel. When we got to the front desk, they noticed it was Mireille’s birthday and upgraded our room complimentary. To this day, I’ve never stayed in a room so nice. When we walked through the door, the blinds, television, lights, etc were set to a motion sensor and simultaneously open, turned on, etc. It was a special occasion. That evening we decided to see a last minute Cirque du Soleil show. I phoned the concierge and as luck would have it, I was able to pick up 2 last minute tickets.

We arrived at the show just in time to grab a few drinks (Mireille a soft drink and I a vodka tonic) and head towards our seats and the show began. We couldn’t have been 15 minutes into the show when I looked over and you’ll never guess who was asleep. Mireille. I mean, how the heck can one fall asleep during one of the most exciting shows in all of Las Vegas. By my estimates, it was roughly a $30 nap, guess I’m still amazed to this day. Regardless, once she “rested” we both were taken aback by the acrobatic display they put on during the show.

Like everything, the trip was winding down and we needed to head back home. A part of me was slightly disappointed this too had to come to an end but couldn’t complain about how amazing our trip to Las Vegas had been. Late as usual with Mireille, we headed out to the airport and arrived just in time to shuffle through security and board the plane. We left Nevada sure about the direction of our relationship. To the best of my knowledge, aside from the occasional work trip, we have yet to spend a day apart since our time together that week in Las Vegas. Life was good.

Mireille’s perspective:

When we got to Vegas it felt like a dream. One that I watched so many other people live and wanted so badly. A guy that was crazy about me, that I was crazy about equally. I hadn’t felt this way since high school. I also think timing was finally right in my mind, I had been through some crazy stuff, broke some hearts, had my heart broken, all because I was searching for more. It’s like I was living outside my body watching this guy who was incredibly smooth just take charge of everything. From plans to conversation, to making moves. It still makes my heart skip a beat when thinking about it.

Robert made my birthday so special. Like I know I keep repeating this concept, but no one had ever treated me this way before. He had gifts planned throughout this whole trip. It wasn’t about the gifts at all, trust me, I usually buy the things I truly want myself. It was about exactly what they were. And the fact that he had enough faith to get them, pack them, and invest all of this thought and time, on a whim. 1044117_10100315880210788_1120713464_nI mean, this was blind faith, I was a wild card, and especially with him… so kudos to him for sure. He had a monogram necklace made, I was probably the most surprised I have ever been. I am not easily surprised, I usually pay close attention to things going on, and just act dumb. I literally mentioned this one time, and just in passing conversation about an outfit or fashion trend. I couldn’t believe he remembered or was even listening. Most people usually tuned out when I started talking about clothes. Then there were two cards. He took the time to pick out two thoughtful cards. A Vs giftcard. THEN he pulled out a perfume sample. He wanted me to smell it and make sure I liked it, then proceeded to have me open a huge bottle of Chanel. WHAT?! Is he psychic? It’s like he knew me before even really knowing me. Also, I almost died at the thoughtfulness of all this and the fact that he had no clue we were going to get back together or even rekindle anything.

By the first few hours of the trip, everyone knew we were a thing… again. We were inseparable and it was just like living on cloud 9. Maybe it was Vegas, or the oxygen they pump in the casinos, or maybe I was experiencing something different and letting it happen. The night of my birthday we had a crazy blow out, and it’s safe to say I had an eventful decade in my 20’s (as you are probably slowly finding out), so it was only natural to end it all with a bang. Our work friend Gina hooked us up for sure and all of us had an insane VIP time and a bar that only is remembered as cloudy to me. It all felt like a whirlwind. I do remember Robert being really good at blackjack and killing it at the tables… I mean like insanely good. He claims to this day that I didn’t give back his winning chips, but I could’ve sworn I did… (I can be a bit whimsical, I’m sure it all went to good use).

One thing that we look back on and laugh is this moment one morning in our Vegas hotel. I think it’s safe to say we are all adults here and that Robert never once slept in his own hotel room. (Aaand now our kids won’t be reading this until they are 30!) But he had set to have a wake up call because we had to work the tradeshow… I mean we did work people! So for some reason we heard commotion in the hall and he went to his room to go get ready. We stepped out into the hall to about three cops and a few bystanders banging on the door and about to break in. Apparently when you don’t answer your wake up call in Vegas, they have to come check on you. I did not know this, but do know they saw a good shot of Robert doing the walk of shame while opening the door for him.

The last night we checked in to Aria (OMG this was Vegas at it’s finest) and lived like we were truly the ones around. I felt like all the pieces just came together and it felt so natural, I didn’t want to leave his side. So I do need to defend myself when it comes to our Cirque du Soleil. I should really be tested for narcolepsy because I know deep down that I have it.. and this is before kids! Sometimes I get so tired that I literally cannot control it and fall asleep. Like my eyes will roll back and I will doze off. This happened because I can’t hang we were non stop working and partying, that by the last night I just needed a nap! But I guess it’s funny now because Robert has seen it happen many times, and it wasn’t him… or the show!

I will never forget on our last day when we were walking through the Bellagio, a couple behind us on the escalator struck up a conversation. They were telling us that it had all began in Vegas for them, they were back visiting years later. We just kind of smiled and laughed, not explaining that we weren’t quite a couple yet, but probably were now, etc etc. We had said, yes, it is all beginning in Vegas. And for us, that’s exactly what happened. For me, I never looked back again. Little did we know, that a month later, it would all change again.

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Dating…the first time

Robert’s Perspective:

I met Mireille on February 6th 2013. Mireille was different than anyone I had ever met and had this strange feeling that we would be together. I get it, its kind of lame I know, but there was just something about her that infatuated me. She was funny, smart, beautiful and wasn’t willing to go all in up front. By Valentines Day there was a small group of single people in the office who were looking to get out that evening and do something fun. We decided to go to Johnny’s Hideaway, classy joint let me tell you… In a way the place sort of reminds me of Studio 54 in that everyone of all ages is welcome. Young and old, no judgement. Its really a beautiful thing when you think about it. Its a place where you can escape from the hustle of the world for a few hours and belly up to an old bar in a smoke filled room. The nostalgia of these types of places always interest me in that there have been tons of patrons in 1234422_10100403278987938_1536510043_nan out over the years and yet nothing seems to have changed from the first day it opened. There were about 5 or 6 of us going that evening, Mireille included. Men flock to Mireille, what can I say, she’s beautiful. I on the other hand haven’t been known to chase after women with the rest of the herd. It always appeared a bit desperate to me and figured, if it was that obvious to me, women could pick up on that as well. The end of the story is, I ignored Mireille until the last 10 minutes of the evening. I finally struck up a conversation with her and as it progressed, I explained to her I wanted to see her again outside of work and asked to take her to dinner.

February 20th was our first date. I took her to Season’s 52 in Buckhead. If my memory serves me correct, she had sea bass, rice pilaf and a glass of white wine. I had scallops, asparagus and a 420, or two… I found myself mesmerized with this woman and running the odds on how we had come to know each other. Mireille just moved back to Georgia from a 6 month stint in Charlotte and previously spent two years in living in New York. All of her professional experience dealt with fashion. Let me tell you, she was no software guru (still isn’t) and was a bit confused having worked with her a couple of weeks, why she would pursue a career at a software startup. Throughout the evening I found out she too had been in a long relationship that didn’t work out. Knowing that I had come from a similar situation it was nice to spend time with someone who was so comfortable with who they were and what they wanted in someone; furthermore, what they didn’t want. The night continued and so did our conversation. I paid the bill and drove her home.

For the next month our relationship progressed a bit. We spent time together but not every waking moment. We were both 29 so puppy love was a bit juvenile to us. I can’t deny that I was falling for her though. I did the moment I first laid eyes on her. I knew I would be with her in my heart. Challenge with love is it clouds your judgment. It just does.

We went to lunch on my birthday, March 21st. I could tell something was off with her. I paid attention to her every gesture and mannerism. That evening we got together and hung out for a bit but felt the relationship was taking a turn for the worst. She wouldn’t tell me but I analyze people for a living and can tell when something doesn’t smell right. On March 23rd, we broke up. Damn.

 

Mireille’s perspective:

Robert was exactly what I needed at exactly the right time. I knew it was special at the time but it would actually take me a little longer to fully realize his role in my life. He seemed to make the right moves, not too strong, not too little. He started talking to me one day on g-chat while we were in the same meeting. Liking to break the rules, I liked him already. He asked me about my dog Georgia because my email picture was with her. That got me talking of course because I didn’t have kids yet so I was obsessed with my dog it seemed like he was genuinely interested. This made for a little 521703_10100215686514758_1405590174_nexcitement in the back of my mind, but I had just moved back to Atlanta 2 weeks before and was sorting out my life. I was finally getting settled in Buckhead and used to being single and loving it. I never thought I would because I relied on my previous relationship for so long as my stability in life, so when losing it, it was like losing an arm. I was relearning who I truly was. I couldn’t date someone now, I just started dating myself! Living in New York somewhat gave me a rebirth or almost a realization of what I was capable of. It finally opened my eyes to that ‘more’ in life that I was searching for.

Valentine’s Day night, a bunch of single people planned to go to Johnny’s Hideaway to party. It’s one of the oldest establishments in Atlanta, and if you haven’t heard of it, ask your parents; they have been there. I specifically remember telling my best friend Amy who I lived with, that ‘I hope this cute guy from work is there tonight’. Luckily, he was there, and he ignored me the entire time. It was the best thing he could have ever done. I loved the thrill of the chase, and definitely didn’t want someone all in bending backwards to be available 24/7. Complicated yes, but self-realization is important, people! We all danced and had fun, and he came up to talk to me the last 10 minutes. He told me that he wanted to take me out where it was just the two of us, and little quieter. Well played. Who exactly was this bad boy, who is actually the most genuine person I know? Well, for starters, he is someone who cut me off on 400 on his motorcycle on the way to work one day, wearing flip flops and barely a helmet, looking back at me and giving me a smile. I was excited and intrigued.

I remember exactly what I was wearing on our first date and everything we talked about. It was so easy to be there. Robert was so easy to talk to, he never judged me… and I feel like he could have for a lot of things, most people did. I told him all my secrets, I told him all my flaws, I told him exactly what I did wrong in every other relationship in my entire life. After I fled to NYC, I vowed to myself that I was going to do it all different, and be completely honest and up front with people. People were just going to have to like me or not, but at that point, I didn’t care. I even told him about the time I shoplifted when I was 16, and since I can’t ever break any rules easily, got caught. I told him I don’t particularly love nature, hate the taste of alcohol, am somewhat high maintenance, and drive like a grandma. He probably should have run for the hills. But what’s funny, is that in his story in life, this was mild. He was a bit of a wild child who loved adventure, motorcycles, and doing his own thing. I loved hearing his story too because as different as we were, it finally felt like home. We dated for a little bit over a month.

I knew what I wanted in a person and Robert seemed to be exactly that, but was still almost certain that it didn’t exist anymore and that maybe I already missed my chance in life. I started to distance myself from Robert because I don’t think I was ready to see that he was exactly what I needed in someone. I had to figure it out on my own, and in true Mireille fashion, after the fact. I know this is dumb, but somehow that quote from ‘Sweet Alabama’ keeps popping in my head to something of the effect of ‘you Southern girls don’t make the right decision until you’ve made all the wrong ones’. I don’t exactly claim to be southern, but I have somehow adopted this habit. He told me one time that he seemed to always have bad luck on his birthdays. And I think someone broke up with him on his birthday once too. Well gah, I can’t have this conversation on his birthday. I made his birthday as special as I could because I genuinely cared about him and I did not want to add to the list. But being as intuitive as he is, he knew I wasn’t all the way there. I held out, and two days later, told him I needed to figure some things out. It wasn’t fair to him if my mind was somewhere else. If I was going to be with him, I was going to be with him 100%, something again, I had never done before. I was going to do it right this time in life.

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How we met

Robert’s Perspective:

As any proper story should, I feel like the best place to start is at the beginning. When Mireille and I met, like most, it was through dumb luck. I was 28 and had a company that went bankrupt the year before and a degree in Finance. Not a great pedigree being the world was still recovering from the modern depression.robert-motorcycle The short story is I had a life long friend with a nice car and pair of loafers, I on the other hand did not possess such. When I asked what he did for a living, he mentioned he was in software. As any broke man in my predicament would do, figured this would be a good direction for my life.  He made the introduction and ended up landing the job at what would be one of the fastest growing companies in Atlanta. At the time I met Mireille, I was currently 6 weeks into role and north of 150% to my quarterly plan. This seemed like a dream job. Software sales is different than anything I had ever known. I was surrounded by brilliance every day and the product you are selling is constantly changing and evolving, literally.  Stimulation everywhere. It had the excitement of derivative securities (what I’d hoped to do on the exchange out of college) with the luxury of wearing flip-flops paired best with a lunch cocktail. What a time to be alive… Software was exciting: Ask questions to identify pain points and articulate a solution in a way that addresses their needs. Come in early and leave late, simple enough. Rinse, wash, repeat. I digress. When I say we were the fastest growing start-up in Atlanta, I need to provide a little perspective. We were onboarding in the range of 15 – 20 people a week. Incredible growth. Every week one of the guys I worked with would ask if I wanted to go with him to walk past the onboarding room to see if there were any attractive girls we should speak with and every week I would pass on the opportunity. I was a single guy at the time but not entirely bought in to the idea of dating at work. Not that there is anything wrong with it. I just looked at is as I was there for one primary function. Make as much money as you can. Let me be the first to tell you how quickly life changes. One week when asked, I decided to take a walk with one of the guys in my division past the onboarding room when I saw her for the first time. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. I was nervous. So I did what anyone would do in my situation and walked in to introduce myself. Said hello to the new hire trainer and pulled up a chair next to Mireille splitting the small crowd of guys conveniently sitting all around her. I introduced myself and said: “Hi, my name is Robert. What’s your name? She replied, “Mireille” and paid me no attention. Clearly she had dealt with this before. Noticing they were conducting a practice exam as a part of their new hire training. I replied “You look perplexed.” Wait, what?!?! What the hell was I thinking.

 

Mireille’s Perspective

I had just come back from North Carolina and before that, NYC, where I had fled in the midst of my quarter life crisis and well deserved karma. I was in a long relationship for most of my youth, where it was me that was the problem. I needed more… Of what, I was never sure, but I tried to force it for so many years. I tried to control the direction of my life because I wanted happily ever after so badly. I needed to control my life because of what my parents divorce did to me, that I forced everything and didn’t just let things be. That’s a whole other blog haha, and it made me exactly who I am, but my point is that I was so consumed with it that I forgot to be who I truly was.
So when Robert came around, I decided I would let things just happen, something I had never done before. I wasn’t going to plan out our first anything. Our wedding colors, where we would live…. I didn’t even think that far ahead anymore. I had been doing that my entire life and it blew up in my face because it doesn’t work that way. And in my case, thank goodness.
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It was January 2013 and I was enjoying being single for the first time in my 29 years of life, and not even looking for anyone. I took a software sales job to just have something to come back to Atlanta. Robert was laughing then and he still laughs now at my lack of software understanding. A friend from college told me to come work for his company, and that I would easily get in because it’s software and I’m a girl. It was a young exciting company and I was excited to not be in retail. I had all my outfits planned out because (doesn’t everyone?) and I figured the job understanding would come later…. or someone willing to tell me everything. Fortunately I got a little bit of both, but that story will come later. Training was fun and overwhelming, but I didn’t have to sell anything yet so I was doing just fine. On the third day of work, they brought in a few of the seasoned guys to help us with a quiz. Basically to show off at what they knew and establish who they were… I was not new to this ego game. All the guys were the same and I just rolled my eyes inside. As I was trying to fill out some of the answers, a guy sat down next to me. I was concentrating really hard and trying to grasp what in the world I was trying to learn. I looked up and the first thing that I noticed was his eyes. They seemed genuine and looked at me in a way no one had ever looked at me, I am not even kidding. Then he said, “you look perplexed’….

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